In search of lost time.Marcel Proust -Swann's Way- (Videobooks) Page 26

In search of lost time.Marcel Proust -Swann's Way- (Videobooks) Page 26 I stopped feeling like a mediocre, inconspicuous, mortal person. Where did this omnipotent joy come from? I felt a connection between it and the taste of tea and cake, but it was infinitely higher than this pleasure, it was of a different origin. So where did she come from? What does she mean? How to keep her? I drink another spoonful, but it adds nothing to what the first brought me; the third acts a little weaker than the second. We must stop, the strength of the drink is not the same. It is clear that the truth I seek is not in him, but in me. He awakened it, but he himself does not know it, he is only able to repeat it endlessly, more and more indistinctly and indistinctly, and I, realizing my impotence to interpret the revelation of this truth, want to at least turn to him again and again with a question I want his action not to weaken, so that he immediately comes to my aid and finally explains everything. I leave the cup and turn to my mind. He must find the truth. But how? A painful indecision fetters him every time he feels that he has gained the upper hand over himself; for it is he, the seeker, that is the dark region in which he must seek, and where all his equipment will not bring him the slightest benefit. Search? No, not only - to create! He stands face to face with something that does not yet exist and that no one, like him, is able to comprehend, and then illuminate. And I again and again ask myself the question: what is this incomprehensible state to which I cannot give any logical explanation, and which, nevertheless, is so certain, so blissful, so real, that before it any other reality fades? I'm trying to re-create this state in myself. I mentally go back to the moment when I drank the first spoonful of tea. I experience the same state, but without the former freshness of perception. I demand from the mind that it make one more effort and at least for a moment hold on to the elusive sensation. Fearing that nothing would interfere with his impulse, I remove all obstacles, all sorts of extraneous thoughts, I protect my hearing and attention from sounds penetrating from the next room. When the mind gets tired of futile efforts, on the contrary, I incite it to distractions that I have just denied it, I allow it to think about something else, I allow it to yell at their highest tension. Then, already for the second time, I remove everything superfluous from it, again bring the still not exhausted taste of the first sip closer to it and feel how something in me shudders, moves, wants to emerge, wants to weigh anchor at a great depth; I don't know what it is, but it's slowly rising; I feel resistance and hear the rumble of space being overcome. What trembles inside me is, of course, an image, a visual impression: inextricably linked with the taste of tea, it tries, after it, to emerge to the surface. But it beats too deep, too indistinctly; I can hardly distinguish the indefinite reflection in which the elusive whirlwind of colors flashing before me merges, but I am not able to make out the form, ask her, as the only possible interpreter, to translate to me the testimony of her contemporary, her inseparable companion - taste, ask her to explain to me , which particular case, which of the elapsed periods of time is being discussed. Will this memory, this moment of the past, drawn by a moment like it from such a distant distance, stirred up, lifted from the bottom of my soul, reach the bright field of my consciousness? I don't know. Now I no longer feel anything, the moment has stopped, perhaps it has fallen again; who knows if it will ever rise again from the darkness? Many times I started again, I leaned over it. And every time, cowardice, distracting us from a difficult task, from a great undertaking, advised me to quit this occupation, advised me to drink tea, thinking about nothing but my today's sorrows and plans for tomorrow - after all, this chewing gum can be chewed endlessly. Look please our another videos: Смотри фильмографию Екатерины Гусевой ! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfDGyx_6stM Quebec to impose a significant fine on unvaccinated residents https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFpX2FmEdUg Scarlett Johansson -sexy dance https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWgi4AVkGT4 Maggie Grace sexy dancing (3D Animation) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53h5KSZNBxo Look at best Combo Christmas Bundle! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyAF9C6ludM Letter for Santa https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-7Em1IhpGg Merry Christmas! Sparklers Christmas https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJBWPUi7mmU Europe was already facing a winter gas crisis https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3Oe4ey7BxI The European Union has said it will slap new sanctions on Belarus https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i96S-Rb-CDU