In search of lost time.Marcel Proust -Swann's Way- (Videobooks) Page 21

In search of lost time.Marcel Proust -Swann's Way- (Videobooks) Page 21 He has two beds in his room - tell Françoise to prepare a big bed for you, sleep with him. Well, good night! I'm not as nervous as you - I'll fall asleep and alone. Father could not be thanked: he was irritated by what he called "sentiment." I froze in place; he was still standing in front of us, tall, in a white nightgown and a scarf of Indian cashmere in purple and pink checks, with which he had tied his head since he had neuralgic pains, and his posture was as if commanding Sarah to say goodbye with Abraham's Isaac on a fresco engraving by Benozzo Gozzoli given to me by Swann. This evening is long gone. The wall on which I saw the candle's rising light is no longer there. In myself, much of what then seemed to me forever indestructible was also destroyed, and much new was erected, from which new sorrows and new joys came, which I could not yet foresee then, just as it is difficult for me to understand the former ones now. For a long time already, my father stopped saying to my mother: “Go with the baby.” Moments like this won't happen again for me. But for some time now, as soon as I strain my ears, I perfectly catch the sobs that I found the strength to restrain in the presence of my father and which I broke out as soon as I was left alone with my mother. In fact, the sobs never ceased, and if now I hear them again, it is only because life around me is becoming more and more silent - so the monastery bells drown out the daytime street noise so much that it seems as if they have stopped, but in the evening silence they they call again. Mom spent that night in my room; I expected to be kicked out of the house for my wrongdoing, but instead, my parents did me good in a way that they did not reward for any good deed. Even now, when such a favor was shown to me, something unlawful, undeserved by me, affected my father towards me, which was generally characteristic of his attitude towards me and which was explained not so much by premeditated intentions as by his random moods. Perhaps even the fact that he sent me to bed deserves the name of severity less than the severity of a mother or grandmother, because in some ways his nature differed more sharply from mine than theirs, and he probably still does not I guessed how unhappy I was all the evenings, and meanwhile both my mother and grandmother knew this very well, but they loved me so much that they were not able to get rid of the pain of the soul: they wanted to teach me to overcome it in order to reduce my nervousness and temper my will. My father loved me differently, which is why I find it difficult to say whether he would have had the courage to do so; the only time he realized that I was having a hard time was when he said to his mother, "Calm him down." Mom stayed with me that night and, apparently not wanting to spoil with a single reproach those hours from which I had the right to expect something different, to the question of Francoise, who realized that something unusual was happening (mother is sitting next to me, holds my hand and, without stroking me, lets me cry): “Madame! Why is the boy crying like that? - answered: “He himself does not know, Françoise, he was just nervous; make me a big bed and go to bed.” And so, for the first time, my sadness was regarded not as a misdeed worthy of punishment, but as an illness beyond my control, recognized officially, as a nervous condition for which I am not responsible; I was relieved that I did not have to be ashamed of my burning tears, I realized that this was not a sin. Archimed Production Studio produces high-quality feature films, documentaries and animation films and 360-degree panoramic animation. Winner of five international film festivals. We invite to cooperation of independent producers, distributors, investors . If you have any questions, please write to the e-mail: transfert@mail.ru The animation of all the characters in real time 3d